There's an ongoing battle inside of me. I tell everyone that my life's mission is to improve self-esteem in young people. I blame low self-esteem on so many issues; unhealthy relationships, body image issues, poor performance in schools, bad relationships with family members. It's all about self-esteem for me and my mission is clear. Then I find myself talking so much about mental health.
I worry I've become side-tracked as I spend so much time delving in to anxiety and healthy coping strategies and thinking about how I can spread the message of positive mental health to parents and young people. Was I wrong about self-esteem? Is my message becoming diluted? Do I actually need to focus on mental health instead?
The reality is the two are intrinsically linked.
Natasha Devon sums it up pretty well in her book 'A Beginner's Guide to Being Mental An A-Z' when she talks about how our attitudes towards health are shaped from such a young age. Our physical health is monitored so closely from the moment we're born with regular check ups and a strong message of eating fruit and veg instilled in us before we're even 5 years old. Nothing like that is in place for looking after our mental health. No-one checks that you are teaching your newborn how to relax and making sure they talk regularly and openly about their feelings for example.
Self-esteem is all about how much or little we value ourselves therefore to build it we need to be looking after ourselves both mentally and physically. Good physical and mental health are the building blocks of good self-esteem. While we've got a pretty good understanding of physical side of things, we often leave the mental side unchecked. (It's worth pointing out that sometimes this can get blurry. For some people a 10 mile run is looking after themselves both mentally and physically whereas for others it could be them punishing themselves).
If someone is struggling with low self-esteem then a good place to start is looking at how they're looking after themselves. This can be a vicious cycle. Low self-esteem makes it hard to want to look after yourself and if you don't look after yourself your self-esteem is likely to decrease. All it takes to break the cycle is a tiny step out of it. Someone who wears a lot of make-up by way of trying to cover up the bits they don't like about themselves may respond to the idea of a relaxing face mask. The time out will support positive mental health and the face mask can be beneficial for the skin. It's a tiny step but if it becomes a habit then that person may then be open to other forms of mental health self-care and investing in mental health self-care will mean a gradual increase in self-esteem.
The reality is, I don't need to be worried about getting distracted on my journey because understanding the principles behind positive mental health are vital to the journey towards good self-esteem. As distractions go it's not a bad one. (The time I spend on facebook and instagram however...)
Instinct and curiosity has led me to where I am now. It's been an exciting journey so far. Sometimes I just need to remember to trust the instinct and curiosity.
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